I don't know if you guys know the premise of telephone poetry, but you sit in a circle and write a line, pass it to the next person, and they fold it over and write the next line, and every time you pass you fold it over so only the previous line is visible. Here are my favorite examples from this evening's exercises.
Your carbuncle is oblong, my frangible queep
Yet I zither and hither, beyond your sleep.
My brain works overtime
And my thoughts are so sublime
What would happen if you put the coconut in the lime?
Disaster would rain upon this blasted earth.
For truly, what is such filth worth?
They walk as if their shoes have wings
But Mercury had fleeter heels
Than those of Zeus
Hercules isn't strong enough
It's made of tougher stuff,
And I know that it will never fail
Despite any negative preconceptions I might have.
No one is as alone as she thinks
Actually, she is even more so because life is pain.
As it seethes through her frame, she writhes in distress.
The caterpillar transforms
The cocoon lies dormant
Under a blanket of cushioning leaves
Which were rated highly by all IKEA customers.
The evening sun beams brightly through the trees
Oh Lord, there are no bees!
The trees can't make it without them.
The bees, they buzz eternally
And they always try to string my knee
With all their woeful weapons to my sorrow--
Will there be a tomorrow?
Woe is me; ice cream up to my knee caps.
It is so cold, I should run laps!
The cold brings on the onset of the season of ginger snaps!
As well as that of the bandersnatch
Yet when the wind whips 'cross my face
I wear a ski mask going downhill
And a veil back up.
Thinking of tigers breaks the silence
And lions cause turmoil
The leopards were in an uproar while the lizards were in a downpour
And the torrents disturbed the wild boar, but that we could safely ignore (NOT!)
We knew we were doomed, so we froze in fear
The whistling terror, drawing ever near
Grabs everyone's attention.
Antelopes and cantaloupes swish;
They shall grant my fondest wish:
A fish filet in Satan's dish
Can be the most amusing pie
Pecans are not very funny, but pumpkin is;
They are both great pies,
But one of them is full of lies.
As I guzzle pails of lard
In the chicken yard
I'm feelin' sad
Not happy or glad
But ever so dadly
As he is wont to do
But never did, through and through.
Encroaching fog from evening gloom
Creeps ever nearer to your doom.
Your doom is never too far off
Watch out! Better not cough!
Sensitive noses can't handle it.
The stench is so overbearing;
It's stronger than all their herring.
The blood of the Titan drips off of the sword's blade
As a gentle breeze wafts among the Hessians.
My eyes, they flit t[w]o and fro [sic]
In search of what I'll never know
Beyond the confines of my brain
The world is so very plain.
We should paint rainbows everywhere.
The bear slumbers and snores
His stomach rumbles and roars
Much like a dinosaur's
It's even greater than before
To infinity and beyond
Yet never sideways
But always on top!
Although it is hotter than hell, I am still wearing my pants.
My coat melted into a puddle
Which, when combined with arsenic, makes a muddle
A staggering slurry, in a poison puddle
Equal only to my heart's contents
And multiplied by my wildest dreams
Thoughts of grandeur eluded me.
Love, how sweet thou art my dear husband.
Yet, I fear we must part tonight
Despite the swiftness of our flight
We shall not arrive, prior fall of night.
Because our stupid car ran out of gas
We couldn't go to the festival
So home we sat, just we two.
The sun's harsh rays, on my naked scalp
Turn my follicles to wasted pulp
And wreak havoc upon my scalp
Those blades of them Injuns
Slice through their saris
Burning them to the bones
Yet not dislodging them from their thrones.
The tainted well feeds unclean thoughts
To all the souls who drink from it
The stars twinkle above
The silhouette of the dove
Flutters past my waking eye
Like a beautiful floating plastic bag
It swirls through my thoughts, unwanted, yet comical.
The purple glimmer of the paint
As distance grows, it grows faint
I can only see it with one eye closed
Yet to look away would be to go blind
A beauty so vast I am blessed to find
Myself alone in all the world
I want to cry, but my eyes were purled.
What happens to the leaves of trees
When the wind blows down the hill
My glass of water threatens to spill.
If only it had not been filled
And all its great potential wasted
But not all is for naught
Not all green things will turn to rot.
What is that smell? It wafts from every drain.
It must be some half dead, rotting brain
Fish sticks are driving me insane
It hurts to surf over them
But the sharks are even scarier than they are
With gleaming eyes of hollow souls
Like the inside of a film canister.
There is nothing to be done about the blob.
Yet the longer we wait, the stronger it throbs.
Like a blistered foot trapped in a boot
The medic tossed in the hat
And said, "Well, that is that!"
Then he walked away
Only ever to be seen again by cats.
I shift into overdrive and zip to the lead
Driven solely by my need for speed.
The ruts hinder my progress
Because they hide mud that consumes my tires
I gun the motor in a futile display,
But everyone recognizes my desperate and obnoxious pretension
And thinks the worst of me for it.
As I ran through fields of golden wheat
I knew I hadn't had enough to eat.
I must muster my strength from some other source
Perhaps from the Red Bull I drank today.
The worm at the bottom winked at me
The beauty of downing a bottle of tequila
Has never been better represented.
Acting tough, it makes it hard
To admit to your mom you are a bard.
In your shocking departure from the closet,
Your face was hidden by a stray hanger
And your form obscured by jackets.
That lovely hourglass figure
Has lost all its sand.
My sporty car enhances my mood.
It makes me feel like one super cool dude!
Which is to say, very good
And not at all bad. Quite satisfactory.
The glimmering, dancing taste is divine
For it is stars upon which dine
The galactic monsters sublime.
- Telephone poetry with extended family